Single Feels Good

As I lie awake a few nights ago, I laughed as I recounted what was said to me earlier by someone who I could only guess has aspirations of being one of my suitors.

"Why are you still single?" He asked.

I smiled because I never quite thought of it. But somehow I was able to answer him with fluidity. I said,

I didn't expect to be single this long in my life, but I value peace of mind above all things. I am from a generation of women that believes in supporting her man. Yes, the song "Stand By Your Man" has meaning to me. Unfortunately, a man worth standing by is quite a commodity in this modern world. Maybe I'm just a victim of the generational gap, despite the fact that we're of the same generation.   

I can't string people along with ulterior intents. I've come to realize that 'Hurt people; hurt people' and sometimes they do it unintentionally. Sometimes they're so hurt that they can't see that their duplicity is very visible. I value honesty. I believe

• If you're not interested, say so. 
• If you find faithfulness a problem, say so.
• If you need to figure yourself out, say so  
• If you have issues with me, say so.

Just say so. 

I tend to give people an easy out for a while. Because unlike most women, I do pay attention to the signs. Long periods of unavailability, inconsistency, disinterest, uncovered untruths are flags that when waved, I take note.  

I'm single (right now) because he isn't available.Whether it's emotionally or physically, he just isn't! 

So, I don't waste time. 

But I'm also single because I believe in fairy tales. I believe that it is possible to find a soul mate. I believe in love at first sight or sometimes second or third. I believe in Prince Charming and I know he's out there looking for his one and only glass slipper wearing, his locked in a tower, or his slumbering princess. Because at one time I was one of those. Now I'm just a princess.

Yes, there are those nights when single is the last thing I want, but it's not a permanent position so I'm going to make the best of it. I'll recount my many travels with a coy smile. I'll remember that there was a time when I rocked and not in a chair. I'll think about how I danced in the rain and about how I swam in the ocean at midnight. 

And in my recollection I'll smile.

I looked at him and finally he said,

I think I love you 

And I laughed out loud.